Not crying every day BITCHES!!!

Hey Guys and Gals,
   So as always we have lots to catch up, and I want to keep everyone updated with our journeys, but equally desire to sit on my butt watching bad TV while icing my legs and eating the free ice cream at the "hostel" we are staying at.
So first I want everyone to know I'm not crying everyday! It's been at least two weeks since I started being able to climb these mountains without the tears rolling down my face. That said, my feet are still a big fucking problem, and there are some days where I do great most of the day, but by days end my feet bring those familiar salty drops back to my face. (They still hurt in the morning, warm up for a few miles, then hurt around mile 8) Still rolling my ankles every few days, and they are pretty much in a permanent state of swollen. My knees, especially the right one, gets pretty painful by days end, and having a 2 mile descent that goes down about 2000 feet never helps that. As we get closer to finishing Maine, we climb at least one, usually two or three mountains a day, and often have a notch (aka gap) in the middle so we go up 2000 feet, down 1500, up another 1000, on a daily basis. Still averaging 10 miles a day (again the occasional 6 mile or 13 mile!) which feels good to me but is still a snails pace compared to 90% of the people hiking this trail.

So as Andrew mentioned we are going to try a few new tactics, given I still am having a lot of "hiking pains" and he is having almost none. First is these massive sturdy men's hiking boots I bought which will protect my feet and joints from feeling every rock and root in Maine. Also we may try to give him a little more food weight, and lighten the load of my pack. I've been against him carrying extra weight from the start, I mean I want to carry my share, but a couple things helped me see that him carrying extra weight will hopefully do us both some good. I want to get to the point where we can carry the same pack weight, but he has had two years of working and living outside to acclimate his body to these conditions. He is also a man with no body fat, one solid muscle from top to bottom. I am definitely carrying a little extra weight on my body, and then just not used to this much wear and tear. My body knows how to eat and exercise for like an hour, so its still getting used to all this. Also while he is very patient, it's hard for him to go the speed I need to go to not hurt myself, so we are hoping that a heavier pack may give his body an idea of the what a physical struggle it is for me to do this. Aka he sympathizes with my pain, but feels none of his own, and that is of course a hard dynamic. He really has been a sport, but when you are hiking partners coming from such different places, it is a constant struggle to stay on equal footing, as it were.
Anyway we hope these adjustments will help, because we are still going slower than we would both like, and this constant pain is getting pretty fucking annoying.

But on to happier things, I've written plenty about the hard parts, and most of them are still hard, but there is a lot of great experiences to be had. I never thought I would climb a mountain, much less 20. I can't even count how many mountains I've climbed, and we are now about 24 miles from finishing Maine! The "hardest 24 miles of Maine" they say and  in about two days we will be hitting Mahoosuc's Notch which most say is "hardest mile on the AT" (btw I'm really tired of hearing hardest mile or section on the AT about the sections I'm about to do) and I'm both scared and also a little excited. The first two weeks of this journey every step felt impossible, the climbs felt overwhelming and the descents felt like dancing with death. But now I see massive rock boulders I have to climb up or down and I know I can do it. I still get scared, I still hurt myself a lot, but I know I am capable of more than I was a month ago. And that feels pretty good.

One of my favorite parts of hiking this trail have been the people I've met along the way. Sure, there are still WAY too many dudes, and I'm so sick of dudes I may have to surround myself with only women for like a month when I get back, but the AT is a treasured trail and so many people are in awe at our attempt that they try to help in anyway we can. We've never waited more than 45 minutes for a hitch. Many times we simply cross the road and within minutes someone pulls over, happy to take us to town or back to the trailhead and wants to help us figure out the best market to go to, tell us how to get around town, or where we may find a free shower. The people who run these little hostels in these TINY towns are gems, spending years of their lives making sure backpackers have a homelike place to rest their weary legs and minds. (When we say tiny towns, we are talking one gas station/grocery store/restaurant no stoplight, library/town hall type places). We met a couple the other day who gave us 10 bucks, and said "Enjoy your next pint, beer or ice cream on us! We think it's so great you are doing this!" It felt a bit weird taking money from a stranger, but every bit helps and Ill always take cash handed to me.

The place we stayed in Andover the last two nights is called "The Cabin" and is run by the SWEETEST older couple, who must be at least in their 70's. It is a three story log cabin that they live in and then open their home to guests. The women who runs the place cooks breakfast and dinner every night (for a small charge) and happily offers leftover for free when available. We got free chicken, ice cream and ham! She said she has tried to shut down this place for a few years (her husband who used to help in the business had a stroke so can no longer be an equal partner in running the place) but "people keep coming and we just can't turn them away" So it's really cool and inspiring to meet people like her all the time who love the AT and the people who hike it so much. Also this place had an ACTUAL bed (most hostels have crap camp matress, some don't even have sheets and make you use your sleeping bag, some haven't had clean sheets, etc) with real pillows and I finally slept for a full 8 hours, which I don't think I've done since I've been on the trail. When you sleep outside you are thankful for ANY sleep you get, but you never get a straight 8 hours. You are luckily to sleep a few hours without someone or some noise waking you up.

The people we met, the views we have seen, make the days spent hiking in the rain, the pain that seems unbearable, and the junk food-palooza all worth while. Or at least today it does. I am still unsure of my ability to complete this trail, financially and spiritually. I know I will get through Maine, and that feels pretty damn good. Not every day feels worth it, some days (aka hiking in the rain so that you are are so wet your feet are pruning and you can't stop to eat because it's raining so hard) I just make it through. Then some days I climb three mountains all over 3700 feet, look at the 360 view of lakes and clouds and forget why I would ever stop climbing the mountains is front of me. Anyway I am still a mess of emotions, but I feel the good creeping in more. Please note this is written after two days of being in a town, sleeping in a bed and eating real food. If I were to write a blog post after being back on the trail for 6 days, it would probably contain the sentence, fuck this fucking trail and also nature can blow me and I hate all the things.

Well we are heading back into the wild in a few hours, so I'm gonna go ice while I can. Much love to all who read, comment, and follow our journey. Yall's support makes a world of difference.